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The Dark Side of the Light Chasers: Reclaiming Your Power, Creativity, Brilliance, and Dreams By Debbie Ford ( Riverhead Trade )
Release Date: 1999-06-01
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List Price: $14.00
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Product Description
Debbie Ford believes that we each hold within us a trace of every human characteristic that exists, the capacity for every human emotion. We are born with the ability to express this entire spectrum of characteristics. But, Ford points out, our families and our society send us strong messages about which ones are good and bad. So when certain impulses arise, we deny them instead of confronting them, giving them a healthy voice, then letting them go. It is to these feelings that Ford turns our attention, these parts of our selves that don't fit the personae we have created for the rest of the world. She shows us the effects of living in the dark, of keeping all our supposedly unsavory impulses under wraps. We find ourselves disproportionately frustrated and angry at the selfishness of friends, the laziness of colleagues, the arrogance of siblings. When we are unable to reconcile similar impulses in ourselves, Ford explains, we waste our own energy judging others instead of empathizing. But most important, we deny ourselves the power and freedom of living authentically. Through the stories and exercises in The Dark Side of the Light Chasers, Debbie Ford shows us not only how to recognize our hidden emotions, but also how to find the gifts they offer us. The very impulses we most fear may be the key to what is lacking in our lives.
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Amazon.com Review
We know the shadow by many names: alter ego, lower self, the dark twin, repressed self, id. Carl Jung once said that the shadow "is the person you would rather not be." But even if you choose to hide your dark side, it will still cast a shadow, according to author Debbie Ford. Rather than reject the seemingly undesirable parts of ourselves, Ford offers advice on how to confront our shadows. Only by owning every aspect of yourself can you achieve harmony and "let your own light shine," she explains. "The purpose of doing shadow work, is to become whole. To end our suffering. To stop hiding ourselves from ourselves. Once we do this we can stop hiding ourselves from the rest of the world." As threatening as shadow work may seem, it is often very effective in creating transformation. Ford's step-by-step guidebook is modeled on a highly successful course she developed about embracing the shadow. Ultimately, she helps readers illuminate the gifts and strengths that lie within the shadows. Although this works sound vague, clouded in dark metaphors, Ford manages to make it clear and specific. She has the writing gifts of a successful seminar leader--inspirational, trustworthy, and able to convey murky material with grace and ease. --Gail Hudson
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I'm not that...
To be honest, I had a hard time reading this book... AT FIRST.
I'm not a mean mommy.
When I read again pages 28-29:
"Then one day while I was riding on the train everything changed. A woman in my car was yelling at her child. I was busy telling myself I would never treat my child that way and how awful this woman was for scolding her child in public. When a little voice in my head said, ' if your child had just spilled chocolate milk all over your white silk suit you would throw a flying fit.' Suddenly the pieces of the puzzle fell together. Of course I had the ability to get angry at a child. I didn't want to admit that to myself, so when I saw someone else fly into a rage, I was judgmental instead of empathetic. This took the focus off me. I realized that it was the quality demonstrated by each person that was within me, not the person herself. I am not the angry woman on the train, but I do possess the impatience and intolerance that she revealed at that moment.
What I discovered was my potential to act like the people I had been most harshly judging. It became clear that I had to be on the lookout for the traits that most bothered me in others."
After reading those words with new eyes, I got it! I had been working so hard at being a nice mom (because I couldn't be a MEAN MOMMY) that my kids were running the house. Once I saw at times being mean was actually a GIFT. An example was making my kids go to bed on time so they got sufficient sleep. They called me mean at the time, but what they didn't realize was that they were happy children the next day! Embracing mean mommy allowed me to make tough choices, some even to keep my children safe.
This book really opened my eyes to what I was hiding from myself and others. What drain of energy! Once I embrace the whole, my life became a lot easier. Thank you Debbie!
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Don't do what I did! ( cabaretjazz )
When this book came out, a new friend told me about it with such enthusiasm - but I said "No,I've read so many self-help books for so many years - now I'm going to stop reading and start living what I've learned!"
Seven years later I finally did pick up this book, and became so inspired as I became aware of what was REALLY in my way all along - that I took Debbie's Shadow Process weekend, then enrolled in the coaching training programs and found healing for my heart. Now, as an Integrative Life Coach focusing on Debbie's work in the Spiritual Divorce and Divine Blueprint models, I am deeply moved to be guiding others to having their own breakthroughs and healing, and begin to create lives they love. So don't do what I did - don't wait 7 years...read this book and all her other books today! ~Sherle Stevens
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The book that started it all
"The Dark Side of the Light Chasers" is Debbie Ford's groundbreaking work. She makes the concepts taught by Carl Jung accessible to everyone. This book helps us to find a new way of looking at our life and our actions and helps us to learn to finally love ourselves.
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Life Changing ( cliffe04 )
It's easy to throw around the terms like "life changing" and "paradigm shift" when talking about books and concepts. When speaking in such terms, often it's just hyperbole, but other times it's true. "The Dark Side of the Light Chasers" is one of those truly life changing books for me. Over ten years ago, when I first heard Ms Ford in a workshop expounding on the idea of loving all parts of myself, it was indeed a paradigm shift. Up until that time, I just assumed that some qualities and characteristics I possessed were just bad and needed to be hidden or disposed of. And I had unsuccessfully tried to do just that for years, causing myself much frustration and concern! Now I'm free to just be all of me.
This book clearly explains the rationale and benefit of "being whole rather than good" to paraphrase Carl Jung. It's a great introduction to the concepts of the shadow and projection. In addition, it contains useful exercises and processes that ensure the reader can have an experience of the heart as well as the head.
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You are everything!
When I first bought this book in 1999 after seeing Debbie Ford on Oprah, I tried to read it about 500 times. But every time I picked it up, I would get distracted, uncomfortable. The ideas in this book are so groundbreaking, so profound and so fundamental that I couldn't even read it! Looking back now, after having read the book and taken her amazing transformational trainings, I can see that it was just my Shadow acting up. Don't let your shadow deprive you of this life-changing read. The understanding that we are a microcosm of the macrocosm, that we are everything, has forever changed my life.
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